Drug Rehabilitation Blog

How to Identify the Signs of a Possible Relapse

Graduation from the Best Drug Rehabilitation program is only the first part of a lifelong path to recovery from addiction

The simple truth about rehabilitation is that it is not a “cure” or a “fix” for addiction. Recovery from addiction is a lifelong process. It is a journey, not a destination. Rehabilitation is just one chapter in the story of life, but recovery is the rest of that story. Successful recovery from addiction requires daily work and effort. The obstacles will always pop up, and the stress of daily life will always be present. Rehabilitation is a way to learn how to handle those stresses and face those obstacles without resorting to using drugs or alcohol.

For many people who are on the path to recovery from addiction, relapse is an inevitable occurrence. This is not true for everybody, but it is certainly true in plenty of cases. One thing that we must remember is that relapse is not a failure. It isn’t the end of recovery. Albert Einstein once said, “You never fail until you stop trying.” This is especially true in cases of relapse. Rather than looking at relapse as an unsuccessful attempt at sobriety, it must be looked at as an opportunity to get it right the next time.

While relapse might seem inevitable for some, many may be able to avoid the issue entirely by knowing the signs of a possible relapse and being able to identify the potential for backsliding into the old habits and addictive behaviors. Recognizing these indicators might mean the difference between relapse and continued sobriety. They include behavioral changes, certain painful or traumatic events that are tough to process emotionally, and even the perception of others, imagined or not – all of these are things that can push a person over the edge and back into their old habits.

“Some of the signs that would show a person is going into relapse would be getting overtired, trying to do things on their own, and not being with other recovering people,” explains Julie, a counselor at Best Drug Rehabilitation. “Normally, a relapse starts a few weeks before they pick up anything. They go off in seven directions at once trying to clean up everything that they’ve done, and they can’t. That’s just impossible to do, it’s overwhelming.” A person who is fighting their compulsive behaviors and the urge to use must remember that the coping skills they are accustomed to, drinking or using drugs, were part of the symptoms of their inability to handle the various obstacles and stresses of daily life. Taking on too much at once is a way to self-inflict even more stress. One solution to this is to try to live life one day at a time, working on each individual problem as it comes rather than trying to solve every problem all at once.

Sometimes, the obstacles and stresses that a person in recovery comes up against are much more difficult than what daily life hands them. Things happen, and sometimes those things are extremely painful or shocking. “My grandmother died when I was 4 months sober,” says Vanessa G., a patient at Best Drug Rehabilitation who has been in several different treatment centers. The pain she felt at losing a loved one was a factor that contributed to her eventual relapse. “I had to go home, and I just wasn’t ready at that time,” Vanessa continues. “Then I had another encounter with health, and then what I did was I started lying about little things, like calling my sponsor, working my program. So, basically my relapse started with a lie.” She wasn’t ready to deal with a tough situation like the passing of her grandmother, and she went back to the only way she really knew how to cope with such a painful experience – using drugs.

With all of the different things that a person can look for when they are concerned that a loved one may be heading towards relapse after graduating from a rehabilitation program, there is one major factor that they might be overlooking – the effects that their actions, behaviors, and attitudes may be having on that person.

Sometimes, particularly in cases where the individual’s choices and behaviors became dishonest as a result of their substance abuse, it can be hard for those around them to trust them again. Rebuilding a relationship takes time, and it trust is not given but earned. Even so, it is vitally important to the recovery of a loved one that the people around them remain supportive and positive. Overcoming addiction is difficult enough for someone to go through without the people that they care about treating them with constant distrust.

While trust takes time to rebuild, if they feel like everything they do is under scrutiny, it may make them feel defeated. “I frequently hear that,” Counselor Julie points out. “You know, ‘They are accusing me of doing things that I’m not doing, so why don’t I just go do it?’” When the people that they care about treat everything that they do with suspicion, even if it is out or concern, it might be enough to push them over the edge and into relapse.

Of course, the choices that they make are their own, and their continued sobriety is their responsibility. However, positive reinforcement is much more effective than negative mistrust when it comes to helping a loved one who is battling their addictive behaviors. This is one of the reasons that we offer an extensive Aftercare Department to our patients at Best Drug Rehabilitation. We remain committed to the success of our patients even after graduation, and do all we can to help them and their families transition to a healthier and more positive lifestyle.

26 Comments

  • Yes but Joe, in Los Angeles all the mo9vestarts drink their Sunday supper

    One hundred percent, you cannot control the universe nor can you control another human being. We can control ourselves, just be there for your loved one and help them feel like they can stand on their own two feet, rewards good behavior and ignore bad behavior. Human beings are either rational or irrational. The main difference between rational thinking and irrational thinking is that rational thinking is based on logic and reason, whereas irrational thinking is based on neither. Throughout our lives, we encounter various situations where we have to make choices. Sometimes we consider the situation and the possible outcomes and make our choices but, at other times, we are overwhelmed with emotion that we arrive at quick decisions. This highlights that there is a clear difference between these two processes. Our thinking process can be categorized as rational thinking and irrational thinking. In rational thinking, we use our brain and, in irrational thinking, we listen to our heart. Rational thinking can be defined as a thinking process which is based on reason and logic. A person who thinks rationally would pay attention to the factual basis. He would analyze the possible outcomes of the situation and his response before acting. Even in the face of a difficult situation, a person who thinks rationally can look beyond the emotions that he feels at that particular moment and act wisely. He would not become a slave of his emotions. When engaging in rational thinking, the individual uses all the information available to him. This can be his past experiences, what he has heard, and whatever information available. This allows him to choose the best option available. It is important to promote rational beliefs and to steer away from irrational modes of thought,
    For example lets say your recent BDR graduate is a 22 year old named Joe addicted to crack , heroine, pot and video games. At dinner Joe starts talking about how they are destroying the very process of the family dinner by having the only meeting on Sunday at 7pm. Slide into his irrationality and turn his mode of thinking rational by stating, ‘Yes I know the time takes dinner of the table and well I guess we will follow the West Hollywood trend of a large green drink. Go to O’brown green juice and fix a green drink for the whole meeting.

    • medicogo

      Joe,

      There is a theory in physics that states that their is no such thing is time, at that time is a misconception created by the human mind and that we really live in a static universe where there is no past, present or future their is only static so death does not exist. So think about that as you think about rational and irrational selves. Inspirations, customs, and standards can and often do change over time. As you become sober you will find that your son’s going to go through a major identity change as he becomes sober in fact he might decide that he wants everyone to be sober just like him and that he cannot accept interactions where people are not sober as they make provoke anxiety for him and that is normal. I had a very hard time socializing when I first returned home from BDR. Facebook was great for me because it allowed me to stay home yet have a social identity.

  • Wallace MacCormack

    There is a lot to see in terms of the things that can lead a person to relapse. I think what is difficult for people who have not been through this to understand is the personal pressure that a person who is addicted to drugs is struggling with. I have never been hooked on super hard drugs, but I do know the effect that some drugs have on you to where they consume every thought that you have. I have seen some of the people that I care about go through this and it is tough to handle. The other point that I liked in this was the taking it one step at a time and getting the mental practice of refocusing your attention away from what you used as the solution to your problems before, drugs/addicting substance. It is really something to see the amount of relapses that do occur, but at the same time to understand that this does not make you a bad person, just a person that hasn’t yet handled the demons that they are struggling with.
    One of the better things to remember is that it is important to stay in communication with a support group, as that will catch any relapse before anything else does. Another aspect is the fact that I have seen people give the person no trust that they are not doing something wrong and that can often lead to the person relapsing. This is a true fact as it makes them go back to the drugs in order to make the people wrong as they are not given any trust any way. It is something that people really need to look at in terms of giving them the trust. Now i there is a situation where a relapse does occur sure some more drastic measures may need to be taken, but in reality, if you do not grant the people space to be then they never will. I really like the way this is laid out, and it brings up a lot of really good points.

  • Andy Reed

    I love what you said about relapse not being a sign of failure because it absolutely isn’t. I started drinking at a very young age and it took me a very long time and some drastic events to make me realise that i had a problem. When I took that first step to getting better I felt happy again, but like it says in the article it’s almost inevitable to relapse. I relapsed 4 times, however I’m happy to say I’m 9 years sober. So don’t worry if you relapse! It’s okay it happens, but never stop trying. At a young age I left home and I missed my parents so much, but I always got the chance to visit them and with every visit I felt a little less attached every time. Until eventually I did not miss them anymore. I will always love them, but I became independent. And the same is true for alcohol! I hope this helped someone! I got better at north point and I highly highly recommend it!

  • Andy Reed

    I can say first hand that almost everything that has been stated in this article happened along my journey to recovery. I started drinking at a very young age and it took me a very long time and some drastic events to make me realise that i had a problem. When I took that first step to getting better I felt happy again, but I relapsed 4 times, however I’m happy to say I’m 9 years sober. So don’t worry if you relapse! It’s okay it happens, but never stop trying. At a young age I left home and I missed my parents so much, but I always got the chance to visit them and with every visit I felt a little less attached every time. Until eventually I did not miss them anymore. I will always love them, but I became independent. And the same is true for alcohol! I hope this helped someone! I got better at north point recovery… and I highly highly recommend it!

  • Libby Trell

    My name is Libby and I just found out that everything I thought I knew was wrong, seriously remember how Descartes doubted everything, which lead to I think therefore I am! I am not comparing myself to Descartes as I have yet to contribute anything that was not sexual to the world. I am a Madame and I just learned that I am also a sex addict. My husband us a veteran and he returned to the world a very different man. I started working for someone that was very powerful in the industry, because Josh could barely speak and we needed money. On paper, I was an assistant and in reality I was a Madame. I watched my little world crumble and I truly stopped caring about the rest of humanit5y. Josh and I were best friends and we had planned as life together and whatever he was forced to do in Iraq being a navy seal, made suicide a rational decision.
    I had one rule and that was I would never engage un sex for pay, I love sex and there is some principle in psychology that basically says once your paid for something you will no longer enjoy it. I enjoy sex and I love to make love and I do not mind to f sometimes. That being said I did something that went against my moral code. I used to be s fashion designer and that is a far cry for arranging ‘dates’. To the best of my knowledge I only worked with girls that were eighteen and older, I drug tested them and dressed them. I tried to only work with intelligent girls, so I scouted at the community colleges. I would find the five best locking women. Guys,

    I knew they were poor and they needed money and I offered them ten grand to sign with me. I then fixed their hair, did their nails and dressed them in appropriate clothes and gave them a Goyard bag. When it was all said and done I spent about thirty grand on each girl and I made seventy. I turned out a hundred women; once they worked for me it was all business. My clients were busy and had a hard time dating so prostitution just made since. A date was three grand, if she spent the night it was five and a relationship endured me a large bonus. I am not sure if I did something ‘wrong’. I mean these girls were not forced and the life I introduced them to taught them culture. Before I made them over, a person would not have thought twice about them. I brought out there true beauty and taught them how to live. Except, I felt horrible. I had to take klonopin for the anxiety, lortab for my pain, Adderall for my diagnosed ADD and lortab for my fiber myalgia and I was emotionally tormented.
    My daughter that doesn’t understand why her dad is dead, she doesn’t remember him before he was in the Special Forces. Her name is Delilah, she is an innocent victim, and unfortunately she is paying the highest price. When a friend sent, me to BDR, I was in such denial I could not believe I was a drug addict, my back hurt and well the other stuff that was par for the course. I had been to a Jewish center in the oats; I think I slept with a different guy every night. I am not a saint but my counselor really helped, e get to my core issues.
    Art therapy was where I was able to digress. Art therapy thought me to be at one with myself. I try to take things one day at a time. The more choices I afford myself the unhappier I actually am. And BDR taught me that certain questions have no answers. Nobody can predict the course of history if my husband and Delilahs’ father had not killed himself.
    BDR taught me that I am going to have to learn to live without that answer. I have to learn to live both with and without the truth. I learned meditate vigilantly about my desires before eve examining existing offers. I write down the criteria and stick to them as rigidly as I can all row while knowing I can never make a perfect choice I can at least make an informed one. My cognitive behavioral therapist taught me that there is no such thing as a perfect decision. That is just buying into irrational thinking, so respect a “well-informed- choice. Aim for good enough!
    As I peeled through the multiple layers that caused me to do what I did sexually, I realized that the reason I chose my mates was only for physical reasons. I liked people because they were physically attractive but why did those people like me. People liked me because they found similarities between us. I found that so sad that in the age of unlimited variety I only worried about looks. Today, I am a graduate of BDR and I no longer live in denial. Humans are born with the gift of communication and BDR taught me how to use it.

    • medicogo

      Libby.
      Life circumstances often predict what people do. Family is the most important thing in the world and the ideals of families can sometimes clash with harsh and painful realities. Life happens and at BDR you can learn a new way to live your life as you confront, control, and handle your addiction. Figure out what you want to do with your life now and go and get it girl. Be agreeable, as you learned in ACC- express similarities and shared values. Show people that you have your best interest at heart as well as your own. You ran a successful company and though it was illegal you picked up business skills that you can turn around and make positive. Think of women in similar situations and possibly you can go back to designing clothes or you can write a ‘tell all’ autobiographical story. Make sure you apologize to your daughter and let her know that your addiction will not happen again, but only if your ready and honest about your recovery which your transparency on the blog indicates that you are. If it is easy for you to say please forgive me then your truly lucky for the rest of us it is not that easy. What you say when you apologize to your daughter is not as important as just the act of apologizing and compliment her residence. To the brain, a compliment is similar to winning a monetary reward. I lost my brother and my husband and I have still not heeled, it is so hard and I will miss him forever as Barron was my other life partner, Johnny will miss the relationship that he will never get to have with an amazing person. I would say that I understand what you’re going through but I don’t, I emphasize with it. I personally never like to tell people I understand what they are going through for I think it takes away their uniqueness and minimizes their situation. My mom left. It is now just me my dad and my husband.

  • Johnny Aguilar

    Since returning from BDR, I have not known how to make the best use of my time. The choices i make are responsible for the consequences I will have it live with. At BDR I learned that when I make a choice, like choosing to be sober, I am creating my life. In turn I am made sober. Choice is by definition an art, a type of aesthetic. Every choice we make turn to the future and I am choosing a drug free future. All the possibilities we have in this life, make choosing exhausting and I just want my wife and I to be happy. The power of choice exists in the fact that there exists an axiomatic amount of choices, with infinite possibilities. I am having a hard time at the moment cause I really want to come back too BDR. i have decided to stop being a drug addict which means I need to figure out what and who I want to be.

    • medicogo

      Johnny,
      It seems that you could really benefit from being in the now.When your mind is not able to creatively day dream your mood becomes negative. It seems that chronological stress might be belt on ruminating, worry or fear about a host of topics. Your consequence needs to constantly be on the right now. If your mind is not wandering around then it is mindful. If it is mindful then it is engaged in the present.If your mind is more mindful then you can hope to alleviate chronic anxiety, pain and physical and mental health.

    • Michael S

      There are certain characteristics, which seem to predispose individuals to relapse. Correct me if I am wrong but I believe they are having a criminal record, not having a strong job history, poly substance abuse, dual diagnosis, wanting to still use other substances.

  • Margaux Machat

    Since returning from BDR, I have found it relatively easy to stay sober and the main way that I stay sober is by being positive. I stay away from negative things that I cannot control. I realize that material goods only offer a little bit of happiness and that they cannot sustain happiness. I follow my passions and live a purpose drive life so that I am constantly building estimable acts. I follow my passions even if I have to forfeit my income to do so. When I first returned from BDR in 2012, I returned to school. I got straight A’s and I began to tutor the other students in my class for free. I then became a very successful tutor and was making 100-200 an hour tutoring psychology, biology, physics, all levels of math, chemistry and philosophy. The more successful I became the less fulfilled I felt as I was literally being paid to cheat for wealthy students. I had a couple of amazing success stories and students whose lives I changed but I still felt unfulfilled. I missed working in treatment and at BDR. There is a psychological principle called affective forecasting. It basically means that we as humans exists within a ‘hedonic treadmill’ meaning the harder we work, and the more materialistic benefits we meet, it does not affect are happiness. There are three scientifically proven things that you can do to improve your decision-making skills and lessen the chance of relapse.
    They are:
    1. Repeated physical actions such as not using drugs and drinking alcohol can rewire our brains.
    2. Bad habits can be ingrained in our neurons as easily as good habits, so choose to act in ways that will help you stay sober.
    a. Do not ruminate
    b. Do not be negative
    c. Always have appositive outlook
    d. Do not hang around people that are using
    3. Read and do pother things to improve your intellectual skills. Experiments have shown that the brain’s neural networks will weaken with neglect so if your just using drugs and drinking and not indulging in anything of intellectual meaning you have weakened your neural networks and you now need to strengthen them to be able to make affective choices.

    • Michael S

      . One way to avoid relapse is to chill out on the self-criticism. Einstein believed that failure was success in progress and if he had believed in the strengths theory he would have believed he was not cut out for science and he would have lost out on revolutionizing physics and winning the noble piece prize. Einstein believed that his skills could and would continually develop so he tried. Empirical evidence demonstrates that our brains create new neuronal evidence throughout life. The main difference between those that prosper in the face of adversity and those that do not is the inherent belief that one can continually progress.

  • Crystal Kuns

    Since returning from BDR, I have not known what to do with my self. I learned at BDR that the choices I make are responsible for the consequences that I will have to live with. Whenever I make a choice I am creating my life, and I am choosing to be sober and in turn I am made sober. Choice is an art, a type of aesthetic. Every choice we make turns ourselves to the future and since going to BDR and being a BDR graduate, I just want to be sober and pay forward the wonderful opportunity afforded to me. Every choice we make turns ourselves to the future and I am choosing a future that is drug and alcohol free. Choosing is exhausting and I just want to be happy. The power of choice comes from the fact that there are infinite possibilities. BDR taught me that I could choose to be anything in the world. I am struggling right now because part of me wants to return to BDR. Now that I am sober and not a drug addict or alcoholic, I do not know what I want to be

    • Margaux Machat

      You are looking for an instantaneous reward…. Try to realize what would give your life a sense of purpose and meaning and eventually staying sober will be easy. It will just be what you are. Try being selfless, volunteering as often as possible and joining groups where you do things for the completely helpless such as animals. I tutored a deaf girl in Biology and didn’t charge a dime. We, humans are controlled by our emotions. If you want to insure that you do not relapse then turn to your thought instead of your emotions.

  • Johnny Machat

    If you are fresh out of rehab and trying to avoid a relapse or maybe you’re a chronic relapse that has become disillusioned with the entire recovery process and your worried that you are not going to make it there are lots of behaviors and thoughts that indicate that a relapse is imminent. One of them is negative thinking. When you start ruminating in your drug use and start glorifying your war stories your well on your way to relapse. If you’re a prescription pill abuser then you might find your chronic back pain returning or you might find that you’re just unable to function without your medication. Your panic attacks might start returning or you might feel so awkward at social gathering that you find it necessary to drink or use.
    Underneath the various levels of shoulds and should not’s that protect us, there is a persistent true self that is awaiting discovery. That is your identity. Nevertheless who are we actually? The essential just be yourself seems conventional enough. Yet we often fear that if we are not careful we will turn into someone else. Authenticity is so hard to discover that the ages, 18-25 has become the time we search for our identity. Well many of us spend those years in and out of treatment centers Identity is inextricably linked to group identity, so for those 18 to 25 year old that are chronic releasers it is easy for them to view themselves as an addict and the second they do that they are on the road to relapse.
    In modern society people could choose from a wide range of identities and there is a level of shame that the person takes on when they do not live up to societies expectations. This is when relapse typically happens as the person gives up, thinking they will never be anything more then a drug addict or an alcoholic. Emerson is one of the first people who started the self-help program by saying do your own thing. Who we are and what we choose is not the same thing though.
    We try most of our lives to prove that we are better then average. Even the alcoholic and or drug addict has war stories and in treatment each addict will try and one-ups the other. I did six grams of heroine a day. I was in prison for nine months for possessions of a firearm and twenty grams of cocaine, when in reality the person went to jail for three days for possession of a gram of cocaine found in a DUI. This is called the better then average affect in pswychol0ogy and it makes sense because who would like to see they as bellow average. What happens is that we fail to recognize that all humans have complex thoughts and desires. Most people do not want to be to unique, and many drug addicts and alcoholics have a hard time recognizing that we’re all individuals in sheep’s clothing. There is a certain amount of uniqueness that makes something appealing and to much uniqueness makes it unappealing, Most addicts and alcoholics do not realize that so they feel extremely alone and isolated instead of realizing that they are not that different then the rest of the population. At this point in time the person might feel relapse is the only way to go. Regardless of the mistakes that lead one to relapse, it is ultimately wrongness and not rightness that teach us who we are. That being said relapse does not need to be a part of anyone’s recovery and if you can keep a positive attitude perspective regardless of what life throws at you, you will be surprised at how easy it is to stay sober.

  • Levi L.

    I had relapse before, I was so stressed out with working to many hours and being overwhelmed with my family so I would turn to alcohol. My wife was doing research on a center and we came across best drug rehabilitation and I’m happy I went there. It has helped me get my life back on track. I had trouble staying sober with another center I first went too. But after I left best drug rehabilitation they have truly helped me stay on track with their programs. I have been sober for 4yrs now. And as an addict there is no cure for it you can only do your best to stick with the program and be around positive people.

  • medicogo

    Repairing the brains elasticity may benefit alcoholics and addicts. The might actually quit drinking and using. The addict has an primary confrontation that survives at the molecular level. Empirical research that has taken place over the last five years, showed researchers that using drugs and alcohol actually causes the brain to loose flexibility. The parts of the brain that will loose flexibility are the parts of the brain, which are damaged by repeated drug use, the synapses, that are responsible for, will.

  • Chealsea K

    Since returning from BDR, I have found it relatively easy to stay sober and the main way that I stay sober is by being positive. I stay away from negative things that I cannot control. I realize that material goods only offer a little bit of happiness and that they cannot sustain happiness. I follow my passions and live a purpose drive life so that I am constantly building estimable acts. I follow my passions even if I have to forfeit my income to do so. When I first returned from BDR in 2012, I returned to school. I got straight A’s and I began to tutor the other students in my class for free. I then became a very successful tutor and was making 100-200 an hour tutoring psychology, biology, physics, all levels of math, chemistry and philosophy. The more successful I became the less fulfilled I felt as I was literally being paid to cheat for wealthy students. I had a couple of amazing success stories and students whose lives I changed but I still felt unfulfilled. I missed working in treatment and at BDR. There is a psychological principle called affective forecasting. It basically means that we as humans exists within a ‘hedonic treadmill’ meaning the harder we work, and the more materialistic benefits we meet, it does not affect are happiness. There are three scientifically proven things that you can do to improve your decision-making skills and lessen the chance of relapse.
    They are:
    1. Repeated physical actions such as not using drugs and drinking alcohol can rewire our brains.
    2. Bad habits can be ingrained in our neurons as easily as good habits, so choose to act in ways that will help you stay sober.
    a. Do not ruminate
    b. Do not be negative
    c. Always have appositive outlook
    d. Do not hang around people that are using
    3. Read and do pother things to improve your intellectual skills. Experiments have shown that the brain’s neural networks will weaken with neglect so if your just using drugs and drinking and not indulging in anything of intellectual meaning you have weakened your neural networks and you now need to strengthen them to be able to make affective choices.

    • Marissa mINK

      Relapse occurs way before the physical act. Your brain experiences a craving and starts a plan of action to get drugs. Because of this fact, there are continuums of things that can be done to prevent relapse. Per Wickstrom discusses drug use and creativity and he brings up the idea of changing your thinking, when you start to have strong cravings go for a walk or to the beach, distract yourself in the gym, whatever it takes to change your head space. Without actually changing it with a drug. Addiction is a lot like the conditioning that Pavlov’s dog experience, only our stimulus response is the euphoria from the reuptake of water neurotransmitter is being targeted most likely, dopamine, serotonin or epinephrine and neurophinerine. Dopamine is responsible for pleasure, serotonin accounts for your perspective and neurophenirine aid in digestion.

  • medicogogo

    The treatment industry has become saturated with treatment centers. It is extremely hard to judge the treatment centers, I mean what do you look for statics? Do you look for the promise of a cure Do you go for the aesthetic? The treatment industry is just one industry where there exists an abundance of choices and the desire to choose is in fact a natural drive. That being said we even have our brains deceiving us as we make choices.
    The first thing we need to do is differentiate amongst they type of treatment being offered. Unless you really don’t care and then you should just go for the aesthetic, and pick one of the fancy centers in Malibu. I went to one called Creative Care, where I got to design my treatment and I choose sun bathing, and then group and then I would attend AA meetings. I insisted that I was not an addict or an alcoholic and I refused to identify myself as an addict or an alcoholic at any one of the meetings. I was twenty-one years old and I was there because I had a suicide attempt that was so intense it landed me in a medical coma for six weeks. While I was at Creative Care I met Scott Weiland and I ended up running off with him. We went to an AA meeting and we decided that if the AA meeting worked then we would stay sober. Prior to the meeting we had purchased an ounce of coke and an ounce of heroine and we told everyone at the meeting, it was a small meeting in Malibu our plans. People told us they would pray for us, bu6t guess what the meeting didn’t work and we got high later that night. That is what I EXPECT HAPPENS WHEN YOU CHOOSE A TREATMENT CENTER FOR AESTETIC PUPORSES, which should be the least important part of your decision. Prior to going to BDR, it was always the most important part in my selection process. I remember being at Promises, another fancy treatment center in Malibu and watching an older gentleman throwing his life away because the staff asked him to wash his dishes. He threw the dish he was supposed to wash and said f’ this place and left. He was there for his third dui, and his little girl would visit every weekend. I never forgot that and I also did not realize that I behaved in a similar manner.
    If a place promises you a cure, really investigate what they mean by that. I do not believe that addiction is a disease; I believe it is a conditioned response that comes from having to deal with an unfortunate set of circumstances that life dealt you. It can be poverty, child abuse, a car accident, being over privileged, having no boundaries, etc. So when a center offers you a cure find out what they intent to cure? I believe it is possible with a lot of hard work to UN learn or UN condition yourself so that the second you have an unwanted emotion you automatically want to use.
    The word cure is typically associated with disease and the one treatment center that advertises in commercials that they have the cure is run by a father and son that I have herd still use drugs and alcohol themselves. Prescription drugs of course and the father never was an addict in the first place, still they deceive many when they offer them a cure.
    So that leaves investigating the different types of treatment and seeing which one vibes with your beliefs. You have the ability to create choice by changing the way you look at the world. If you believe that the negative things that happen in your life are beyond your control, then you will be depressed and want to give up. If you believe you have control over what happens to you, you are less likely to trey and escape drug addiction and instead you will want to confront, control and handle it.
    I chose BDR as a treatment venter in 2012, when it was pretty new and did not offer much aesthetically. At first AI was very disappointed but then I really liked the authenticity I witnessed there. I remember telling them when I walked in the door that I did not want to even stays sober and they did not yell at me or kick me out. Instead the staff gave me some books to read. I read the books all night because I was so surprised by such a different response and so happy to not have the Big Books of Alcoholics Anonymous given to me. Smart Recovery Worked for me because it did not ask me to be powerless. Instead it taught me to cultivate and learn optimism.

    To begin to even try to choose the right type of treatment center we have to be able to differentiate between the programs offered. I was looking for a treatment center for my uncle many years ago and the over saturation of choices made me disillusioned with the entire process. When one is disillusioned it means that they no longer believe in something. My friend Adam Goldstein known as DJ AM was a huge supporter of the entire AA program. He never turned anyone down or was too busy to help him or her. He got into a plane crash with Travis Barker and he needed medication to get back on a plane. The AA community shunned him instead of helping him, they have no flexibility and the program does not adjust with science. The focus of the program should be not drinking and if the members if the programs find themselves in the middle of having something traumatic happen to them, then the program should teach them how to adjust their vision to see that they have control instead of passively suffering through the traumas of life. Prior to finding Per Wickstrom and BDR I was disillusioned with the entire recovery process. After graduating from BDR I discovered that I was confused and just under an illusion about what recovery was. By under an illusion I mean I was wrong about my beliefs. It is strange how whenever knowledge is discussed, analogies to vision are used. If your right your enlightened, illuminated, a visionary and if your wrong your in the dark. When we understand something we say I see. The reason for this is that we humans generally accept what we see as true. We regard our subjective ideas as direct reflections of reality. BDR taught me that this was one of the reasons I used and abused drugs and alcohol. The illusion that one is powerless over them, trick all of us as we discover there is definite fallibility to knowledge. Plato learned that knowledge was justified true belief. In todays society knowledge is credentials of those in authority paired with their beliefs. The problem with this is that regardless of anyone’s education, what can they claim to know with certainty. BDR taught me to investigate and to confront, control and handle situations as they came up in life. BDR teaches you that it’s your life and you can make that life whatever type of life you want. BDR taught me what to do when life did not offer me a choice. BDR taught me I have the power over my addiction and that it is my choice to use or not use.

  • Kelly J.

    Speaking from experience, when I had relapsed it was right when I had gotten out from another facility. After a few days from being home I ended up turning to alcohol once again to easy my pain. I honestly couldn’t handle being home. It was so overwhelming for me. This article/video is so very true on what signs to look out for. I am so happy I found best drug rehabilitation; they truly helped me out so much. I am 2 years sober I honestly don’t thing I would have made it this far being sober if it wasn’t for this facility. They have great programs and lots of activities for you to do while you are there. The staff members are so caring and help you even when you are done with the program.

    • Margaux Machat

      Congrats Kelly, two years is a huge deal. I was a chronic relapser myself and BDR was the first program that did not make me say I was powerless and ironically it was the program where i made the choice myself to no longer drink alcohol. I really became an individual at Best Drug Rehab and as a graduate I experienced certainty in myself. For those of you who are not there yet, this video does go over all the warning signs for a release and do not beat yourself up over it, to error is to be human and we all have a different “trip” for lack of a better word. Sometimes it is the mistakes we make the bring us the best aspects of ourselves, so if you relapse, be humble and try again, something did not take. Do not give up on yourself, your worth this!

  • Sophieann

    I think this is a great article and it contains some really good data about how to handle a family member who has been on drugs and how to handle them correctly. But the truth is that there are life situations that can trigger that they use again. We can not handle everything in life, but when one has a family around them who supports them and a sponsor it can really make a huge difference. Also making sure that one chooses the right aftercare program before they leave the rehab is very important. I also thing that if one goes to a great rehab center, like best dug rehab and learns things about how what and why, and why they have addiction issues, it already handles loads of the things. I really like all the programs that they provide in this rehab center, I like the entire approach, I honestly like everything about it. All the programs that they provide the are all holistic, there are no drugs that they use to get people off drugs, they are also very focused on what is the best for the person, they really make sure that they get the help they want, they get the program that is suited for their situation, not what everyone else is doing. This rehab place is the place really for the people who need help with addiction, everything I have read about it so far I really like it, I like everything about it, I find that all in all it is a place where they really care about people, they really want to help people, and they have already helped so many people to get better and have a better life. All the staff look really caring and also all the clients that left a testimony I really liked their stories, very nice place indeed.

  • David H

    Wow these comments are awesome. Love to read success stories from people who have fought with their addiction and they reach their goal of being sober. That is so awesome. Congrats to all of you! You guys are very strong people, and it really looks like that beast drug rehab is a great place, since these people are the real testimonies that they help others. I have read this article, and I think it is a really great one. Honestly I never thought of those thing that the lady listed, as signs of possible relapse. Like that the person is working too much, tok tired and trying to handle everything fast at the same time. It is true that when one returns from their rehab treatment, they come out with a certain goal to fix things that they messed up, but they have to do it with a gradient, take it step by step, cause if not they will relapse and because they are just not able to do everything at once. Getting peoples trust back will not come in a second, but by being honest and yourself you can get it back. And the other most important thing is definitely to have a support system around you, that your family helps you, that you have a great sponsor maybe a counselor, and so on. I think that the family member also need to be educated on how to help a recovering addict to stay substance free, but they can be very helpful and they are the most important thing in a persons life. And it is very important for the family to be supportive and be there to help, even though they are probably very angry, cause even if the person relapses it is not the end of the world, they just need to keep trying and for sure they will arrive. For some it takes a bit longer, but everyone can do it.

  • carcol

    Very good information to have. Relapse is something all recovering addicts worry about as it does make them feel like a failure and that they’re never going to get through it. By stating in this article that it is not the end and is not a failure and that all they have to go is get back up and continue is such good information. No one wants to feel like a failure but if the person knows that they are not alone and others have had to go through the same things, it definitely would make it easier to continue rather than give up entirely. It also shows how the people in the person’s life can truly help them without giving their life over to the addict. Being there for them and pushing them in the right direction is something everyone can do.

  • Laura L.

    This is truly the Best Drug Rehabilitation. Being able to get outside and stay busy is the best way to keep distracted and take your mind off drugs and alcohol. I have some family that attended rehab centers that made them feel like they were in prison, but something like this could really make a difference in making someone more comfortable with getting the help they need. I feel like when you gather a group of attics together and tell them “DON’T THINK ABOUT DRUGS OR ALCOHOL”, well it creates the obvious problem in that now that is all they can think about. Centers like this could that keep you busy help you build relationships with people like you that all want and need help, it will create better environment that they want to be a part of and no longer feel like they are forcing themselves to be a part of. This is truly a modern and fantastic rehabilitation program.

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